Monthly Archive for January, 2012

This just in! Perfectionism Has Lost its Place in The Professional Life Coaching Journey!

Hey everyone, did you hear the news?  We no longer have to be perfect to be professional!  I don’t know about you but that sure is a load of my shoulders.  Did you know that people actually prefer to work with people who are human and just like them?  And here is the kicker; if you are okay with your flaws you actually give permission for others to be ok with it.

How empowering is it to approach your professional life coaching journey from this perspective and this truth?  People actually relate better to people who are confident with who they are and are ok with their vulnerabilities or flaws than to people who seem to be super-human.

This epiphany relates to my previous article last week about being confident.  When we are ok with all our greatness AND our short comings our confidence in ourselves sky rocket.  When we stop trying to be everything to everyone we can take that mask of perfectionism off and just enjoy.

There will be some people who will not want to sign on with you but if you are authentic to who you are then those people are likely not a match anyway.  It’s a lot like that quote “Those who matter don’t care and those who care don’t matter.”

When it comes to the professional life coaching journey people are really buying YOU.  They are not buying your product or service they are buying who you are, your values and you experiences.  Your coaching style and your products and packages are all created from who you are and your values that drive you so be authentic.  BE YOU!

P.S.  This was the feedback I got from Kate when I asked her about my last entry.  Her challenge for me was to write in a Canadian accent.  So tell me, how did I do eh?  Let me know on Facebook and while you’re there let us know what you’ll let go of to be even more authentic.

Cheers!

Ali – Student Support

Share

Fake ‘Till You Make It! – It’s All a Part of the Professional Life Coaching Journey

We know just how much you all love Kate’s articles and I am sure that every Tuesday when Kate is off changing lives outside of The Coaching Institute you really miss them.  Well I’m hoping to fill those size 10 literary shoes and provide you with equally inspirational articles once a week.  Here is my first of regular attempts.  Enjoy!

Kate last wrote about the importance of believing in yourself as a coach and pretty much believing in yourself in general.  I thought that was a really great message because let’s face it, if you don’t believe in yourself what makes you think anyone else will?

We all have self doubting moments.  Even the guru’s have the odd moment of “can I, little old me, really do this?!”.  It’s the decision you make in this moment about how we WANT to be that makes the difference.  Are you going to face the fear and do it anyway?  Will you step up and embrace the shocking state of perturbation (a word I know Kate has introduced you to – it’s a state of such upset that once through it you will never and can never be the same again)?  Or, will you let the fear and doubt over take you, make excuses and justifications why you can’t or won’t?

I say go big or go home!  Step up or step out!  It’s all a part of the professional life coaching journey!  If you are passionate about something feel the fear and do it anyway; find your strength and strategy to feel confident even when you’re not.  My strategy is the “fake it ‘till you make it” strategy.  Stand up tall, throw your shoulders back, chin up and head back and speak with as much confidence and certainty as you can muster.  I have learned that you can say pretty much anything if you say it with confidence and certainty and no one will think about it twice.

So in that moment of self doubt, where you have a decision to make; do I play big and be my magnificent self or not?; ask yourself this question (which, by the way, is a great discovery questions for new clients) “if you knew you couldn’t fail what would you do?”  You’ve got nothing to lose and everything to gain so what are you waiting for?  You might just surprise yourself!  And when you do, remember to celebrate and share your magic moment with us (on Facebook) and your loved ones, because we always believe in you!  Enjoy YOUR professional life coaching journey!

Happy Tuesday

Ali – Student Support

Share

Awakening what is inside you as a professional life coach

I’m curious about some of the conversations I’ve had recently with coaches as we move into the New Year.  It’s been about what it takes to believe in themselves and who they need to be to achieve the life they seek. So I thought it was good timing to refocus on what you already have to create success as a professional life coach. 

You and I know that it’s not about what others believe about you…indeed it’s what you believe about you, because that does exist inside, even if somewhat buried deep. It’s what you are prepared to hold yourself accountable for and what you take responsibility for to live the life that you choose and take the action required. And this is where your vision must be connected to your heart. Feeling the emotional connection provides the drive for you to stand up tall, face the day and say ‘this is it’.

We have a saying here at The Coaching Institute ‘Because people with passion can really change the world’…So I ask you…Is that you? Do you have an insatiable passion to change this world for the better of all? What is it that gets your juices flowing, that drives you when everything around you seems insurmountable? Because this is at the core of who you become to achieve the dreams that you have.

If you are not clear on where you are going then how can you know where that is? Sometimes we may justify to ourselves that we haven’t got any goals because we are not clear on where we’re heading or that we’re not as good as others therefore we’re not ready.

The bottom line here is you have to have faith in you. You have to know that you can achieve, you just have to have the right leverage to get yourself going. You have to break that old thought pattern, that old strategy, and introduce something that is going to serve and support you.

I like the example that Anthony Robbins refers to in his book Awaken the Giant Within. He uses an example where his friend had tried everything he could think of to give up smoking yet to no avail. So, in other words whatever motivation he was using simply wasn’t enough. It is highly likely there was insufficient emotional power to giving up, and it was less painful to stay the same.

It was only when his daughter broke her father’s pattern did he have success. And so how did she do this? Robbins tells it that this young girl knew what she wanted so when she walked in on her father one day as he was lighting up a cigarette she became emotional and pleaded with him to stop killing himself. According to Robbins the father was a bit puzzled and reassured his daughter he wasn’t killing himself. It was only when this young girl pointed out that she wanted her father around to see her married that he took complete stock of the impact of his pattern of behaviour and stopped. In other words the thought of not being around to see his daughter get married was sufficiently emotional for him to stop smoking. It was powerful enough. Robbins describes it as ‘…with his heartstrings firmly grasped in her hands…’- That paints a great picture wouldn’t you say?

When I first read that I also felt the impact of that, of what it would be like to have your young child bring you out of your unresourceful way and into something far more powerful and resourceful through some simple yet powerful words. And as professional life coaches we not only can find our big emotional connection for ourselves, we can also find it for our clients. We have to make that connection to break old habits, old strategies that no longer serve, and keep that passion for what is possible.

The bottom line is you have to find this leverage for yourself. So, ask yourself this question…What is the most powerful emotional connection that you can have where you know that living any other way is just not enough?  And keep working with this until you have the answer, until you can feel the surge of emotion at the thought of creating that new way of being, of having, of doing.

Having the goals to work towards your big WHY has to be powerful and motivate you so that in those moments of doubt it simply isn’t going to stop you moving mountains to achieve your dreams. All I can say is ‘seize the day’!

“Keep your dreams alive. Understand to achieve anything requires faith and belief in yourself, vision, hard work, determination and dedication. Remember all things are possible for those who believe”. Gail Devers

So what is your big motivator? Share with us how powerful this vision is for you, on our Facebook page. We’d love to hear from you. Enjoy your Monday. Kate Welk

Share

There is fun to be had on your professional life coaching journey

“I never did a day’s work in my life. It was all fun”  Thomas Edison        

You’d agree there is much discussion on setting our goals for 2012 and creating the best year that we have ever had. And that’s a good thing, isn’t it? It is an opportunity to clear out the old and bring in the new and step up even more than we ever have before. You would know this is how success is created in any area of your life. It is also a timely reminder to ensure that when creating these goals, when creating this focus for our best year yet, that we take a moment to remember for what purpose we are on this path. And today I thought was a good day to put out the reminder that success can and definitely also should be fun as you embark on another year of your professional life coaching journey.

Absolutely your success is about stepping up and stretching yourself further than you ever have before, for it takes action, commitment and focus to create the results that you seek. Yet I feel that our efforts would be hollow if there was no fun or enjoyment in the process. You know that in order for you to be resilient in those times of challenge you have to have passion for what you do.  And having fun and enjoying what you do is key to creating a beautiful and enriched life. After all, if you don’t enjoy it then why do it?

Do you remember when you were a child and you were taken along to an event that you really didn’t want to go to? Do you remember why? I can remember sometimes going along to a relative’s house and I dreaded going. And the reason was there was nothing for me to do, and running around inside the home was frowned upon, as it was important to be polite and ‘well behaved’. That meant sitting politely on the couch, avoiding eye contact with other siblings, for fear we’d burst out laughing at nothing in particular. And oh, how the time dragged on as a result! It wasn’t fun at all and I didn’t enjoy it.

Yet other times when we’d visit other friends or relatives, I’d be so eager to get going I’d be ready way before we were scheduled to hop in the car. All because I knew I was in for some fun and a half. I distinctly remember visiting my grandparents down by the beach and we just had a ball. We were encouraged to run around outside, go down to the beach and simply be free to have fun, and leave space for the adults to chat. It was awesome. And the day would fly by and it was always a surprise to be told it was time to go again. So reluctantly I would get back into the car, finding every excuse I could to linger on in this temporary place of paradise and freedom.

And so this is how I intend to have the best year yet in my professional coaching career and my life, as will so many of my colleagues. My husband and I spent time earlier this week finalising our 2012 goals, and we included what we intend to do for fun. This includes how often we’re going to spend quality time together, how all our goals have foundation in what we are passionate about and what we love about our life. And we had so much fun creating these goals and dreams that time just flew by. We know that being grateful for what we have and what we can achieve is based on how much we can enjoy the experience along the way. When you love what you do, when you are passionate about your results you and I know when we look back in 12 months time we will once again be like the child of yesteryear, amazed at how quickly the time flew by and how much fun we had packed into our days. And that’s a pretty cool way to be, wouldn’t you agree?

“You’re off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting,
So… get on your way!”

Dr Seuss (Oh, the Places You’lll Go!)

What are your goals around having fun in 2012? Why not share them with us on Facebook? Have a fantastic Wednesday and Happy New Year!!! Kate Welk

Share