The idea of sharing a whole day with Sharon was a grand moment and I felt excited, thrilled, eager, even a tad anxious, nervous and apprehensive. Sharon had made an offer to good to refuse, a day spent with her as an additional and generous bonus to Joe Pane’s Extended DISC workshop. I was excited! I hadn’t met Sharon before, or even paid a visit to the TCI Headquarters, so spending a day working with Sharon was a fantastic opportunity. My anticipation of the day was just; the day exposed me to an intelligence of creativity and change. Here’s a summary of the 3 key themes that were absolute standouts for me.
Connecting and Counting
Straight up, we are into it – awesome content. Sharon built a bridge around two core fears: that of; will I connect and will I count? Imagine meeting a prospective client for the first time. Now just consider how they might be thinking, feeling or visualising when you first meet and greet them. With that in mind, come back to yourself and ask, am I meeting them with a self belief of being able to connect with them? Am I meeting them head on with the idea that I count? If you choose to meet this situation with the positive intention and anticipation that you will connect and count to them, then you will know that due to that clarity of focus, achieving this outcome is assured. .
Reflect instead on the very same situation and meeting your prospective client with opposite happening within you. You feel nervous, self conscious and whatever other limiting self beliefs you may have conjured up for yourself! Can you imagine what type of impression that would happen to make to some innocent prospective client?
Aside from those two analogies, the real message that Sharon was intending was simply; if you have all those feelings going on for you within, imagine the other person. In essence, Sharon is implying, greet and meet with the anticipation of eagerly meeting someone for the first time with the belief that you will connect and count to that person, because it is highly likely that this other person is in the same situation feeling all their own self-limiting beliefs. Therefore if you go in shining and believing that you will make them feel as if they are connected to you and that they count to you, then watch the phenomenon occur. That person will melt and feel that connection and will just want to be more like you.
The fundamental point of Sharon’s discussion is, these two fears (of not connecting or counting) can be driving us and then reflect for us the very condition we are fearing. So the key to this message is to pre-suppose that you are connecting and counting with each and every person you meet. Bring yourself to lead the connection with the other so that the response is just that – connecting and counting. Remember your client (potential) wants you to be the superstar and magician that they want to be!
When you spend a day with Sharon, you have to play at 100%, there is just no way around it. If you are not playing at this level, she’ll call you on it. And that’s just what she did. We were a courageous group of eleven, intimate enough to get to some real micro messages, but not big enough to escape Sharon’s gaze. But heck, that’s what we were there to do – be called upon to step up.
The world in beige
In support of the visuals out there, you will understand when I talk about the world being in the colour beige. For those who are colour blind, I’m not sure what you imagine, I suppose it is something dull and boring. So go for that image.
Sharon raised the idea of thinking about the world being in the colour of beige. You know the suggestion that in most people’s world the things that are going on are mostly beige, in other words, the majority of people’s worlds are not that colourful, in fact probably rather uninspiring. And if you could describe it in a colour it could be called beige! I bet most people (like potential clients) would say that their world is pretty bland and may be dull and boring. As Sharon said, our biggest competitor is the television, and something Joe said, variety for some is; changing the television channel. That said, how hard would it be to make someone’s world more colourful, for example, bring a rainbow to their world. I trust the visuals can picture this image, for the audio and kinesthetic, maybe you could pretend to visualize it. To me, as a visual, its easy, and a big bonus is that where I live, will often see double rainbows right out my front door. It is always welcome to see such delights and hence believe that something cosmic is going on. So when Sharon talked about being your clients rainbow – I had a uh uh moment. I knew in that instant what it felt like to see the rainbow. So being someone’s rainbow, means that you must be being someone who is pretty awesome. And let’s face it, how can you not stand out, when everyone else is being beige, how easy is it to be rainbow. What does it take to be the rainbow in a beige world? It’s playing at 100%. It’s being authentic. It’s connecting and counting – it’s being all that your client wants you to be. So are you ready to be someone’s rainbow?
At this stage of the game, the day was shaping up to deliver right on time. Sharon wasn’t pulling any punches; this information is relevant and real. To be an outstanding coach use these metaphors as awesome tools to bring the story home – to really match our client’s map to their territory.
So, where are we right now? Where we are is:
- Connect and count to the people you meet – all of them!
- Know that mostly, in people’s world, it is beige – therefore be their rainbow!
Ok – the big finale!
My final awesome moment …
Knowing who your Avatar is!
Your avatar is your preferred client and the one you want to be coaching. The more you know what they like and dislike and what keeps them awake at night, the closer you are to obtaining your ideal client. Identifying your Avatar is crucial if you want to create a clear picture of who is in your niche market. When you can identify and describe this – (try brainstorming 50 items that describes your ideal client) – then all you have to do is be that person. When you can be the person that your client wants to be then you will be attracting your ideal client to you. And subsequently, you have your Avatar.
Personally, having the knowledge and understanding about who is my Avatar, was like someone handing me the key to Aladdin’s Cave and discovering all the treasure within. Knowing who your Avatar is a major step to progressing and developing a business that appeals straight to your niche market. When you know your Avatar, you become that, and then the clients want to become more like you. Sounds like a winning strategy.
Sharon Styman
13/02/10
