Before coaching, I didn't know who I was | The Coaching Institute

Before I started my life coaching journey, I didn’t know who I was…

In the couple of years before entering the community of The Coaching Institute, my life was chaotic.

My mother had died, soon after my father. My son had some issues with the law. I had left my husband of nearly 30 years. In hindsight, probably 28 years late after living in a relationship devoid of intimacy.

I was a primary school teacher with 30 years’ experience. I didn’t know who I was, but I knew I was co-dependent; a people pleaser; judgemental; and The Princess. That was when I decided to start my life coaching journey.

Jan Hutton
Jan HuttonAccredited Professional Coach

"I answered a Facebook advertisement that invited me to a free weekend of personal development, which was very attractive to me, and I felt like I had nothing to lose."

Along I went 3 years ago, for the very first time, to The Coaching Institute. I listened and interacted with Matt Lavars, the presenter, and by the end of that weekend I signed up using some of my Mum and Dad’s inheritance money. I knew that they would be happy that I was doing something for me, and that I was developing my life through life coaching.

At this point in time, I was desperate. I was in a hole. My relatability strategy to other people was to be the Chameleon. I behaved in a way that I felt would keep everyone else happy. Their opinions were more important to me than my own. Through training and coaching, this changed for me.

"With my newfound knowledge of life coaching and many years’ experience in education, I thought, 'I could change the world'."

Jan Hutton
Jan Hutton

"I thought to myself, 'I know what I should do, I should do workshops.'"

Soon after doing my Foundations of Coaching Success weekend, I signed up to the Accredited Professional Coaching course! I started workshops straight away, as I felt I needed to test and measure myself.

I believed that people were flawed. Consequently, I believed that - like me - at 30 years old most people don’t know how to parent. I advertised and ran several workshops for about 40 people all up.

Did it work? Not the way I wanted it to. This was because I was coming from fear, judgement, righteousness and even an “I am better than you” mentality – which I soon learned were all masks for “I have no self-esteem”.

"To me, it is about being who the client needs me to be, not what I need me to be."

Later, during Meta Dynamics™ II training, I had an “Ah-HA” moment. I realised that the workshops I had been running were for me to avoid closeness. Now, my workshops are much different and my standards for myself are so much higher.

I am being curious, compassionate and courageous thanks to Matt, who has mentored me regularly. Most importantly, I am becoming my authentic self and I feel safe being more open with my clients. Further, I realised that it is all about giving, giving, giving.

A workshop’s success is when people want to continue their relationship with you. Now, I am filling my calendar with daily appointments to get to know people and develop those relationships.

"I am coaching someone whom I met just 2 years ago in my first Business Networking International event."

My business is called Learning Through Life. At the moment, I am putting lots of effort into marketing and sales and I have recently become more financial. For example, I am coaching someone whom I met just 2 years ago in my first Business Networking International (BNI) event, which is essentially a referral organisation.

Because of the continuous support from The Coaching Institute, my coaching is improving, I have a way to help my clients grow to be who they were meant to be and I am no longer fearful of connection.

"By having deep authentic discussions about what they want... I am working with people... Using all the skills I now know."

Based on Matt’s advice, I am having coffee chats. I am also working with various organisations, including: commercial, such as lawyers and childcare centres; as well as charities.

By having deep authentic discussions about what they want and then writing a proposal for a program, I am working with people through individual coaching and using all the skills I now know.

Similarly, based on Sharon’s advice I'm being the most giving person in the room when I am at networking events. I want to attract people through my ability to give, especially by using my training in Emotional Intimacy.

In other words, it works!

In addition, I am also absolutely loving my use of Your Ultimate Self (YUS) and Meta Dynamics™ along my journey.

"My first milestone was most definitely having the courage and the conviction to leave my career of nearly 40 years. And because of not being there, I am growing every day..."

In the beginning during Foundations of Coaching Success, I wrote down my 'ideal average day'.

Now, I am making some of that 'ideal average day' happen.

Every morning, I walk along the beach with my two dogs while the rest of Melbourne make their way to work in their little cars, to sit in their little offices. I now work full time in my business, which I love.

My aspiration is to be a speaker for parents who want to change their way of thinking, to make a difference in how they see life – that is, adults who are parents.

When parents discover their new found self-love, subsequently the the flow-on affect will be a more real connection with their children.

"I am not the same person who started this journey..."

I thank Sharon and the whole team at The Coaching Institute, especially Matt Lavars, Joe Pane and the WOW team for all their awesomeness!

As well as the Your Ultimate Self (YUS) program, Ultimate YOU, Emotional Intimacy, Meta Dynamics™ trainings and all the other stuff in our Members' area.

By working through these programs, I have changed. I am beginning to see results. Moreover, I am trying anything: I will test and measure any idea.

"The world is my oyster, and I am the pearl."

I attribute my success to never giving up. As well as the support that I have at the end of the phone. Above all, the community of friends I have met through The Coaching Institute and the WOW team, who listen to me at my worst.

I no longer tension tag to my family members. I could have given up 1000 times or more, and I am a much calmer and more insightful person now. I have healed my relationship with my sons.

In conclusion, I know that without The Coaching Institute and the struggle to grow and make a difference, I would be an alcoholic.

I would be more dysfunctional than I was 3 years ago, and probably be in a very bad relationship with somebody who treated me again the same way as I was treated - because that's what I would have attracted.

Now I'm learning who I am, and I am becoming awesome.

Jan Hutton is a life strategist who helps busy people, parents and caregivers to develop successful strategies for enhancing their relationships through a holistic life approach.

Jan Hutton
Jan HuttonAccredited Professional Coach