For me it was a way of finding out a little bit more information, information gathering if you want to use that, but what it means to me is now that I have made the commitment, to me, it means that I'm not afraid to say yes to me...
What was the key reason that you decided to say yes to join the community and come into the Foundations of Coaching Success training?
I did it for me, for me, personally my personal journey, to find my identity with myself my I amness if you will.
[I'm getting underneath] the roles that I've had in my life have always been about serving. I've given a lifetime for that. Now I still want to serve, but I'm mostly serving myself.
“I'm taking that first step I'm not just jumping straight in and not knowing anything about it. For me it was a way of finding out a little bit more information, information gathering if you want to use that, but what it means to me is now that I have made the commitment, to me, it means that I'm not afraid to say yes to me. . . .”
Did you know that that was the challenge that you had before you had and did your Foundation's training?
No, because I also ... I came and did the Foundations of Coaching Success as a guest.
It was an opportunity, and it wasn't until probably day three on the last day that it really hit home. It really meant ... I've got to do this. This is for me. This is my life. Change your story. Change your life.
Up until that moment did you think that you were going to do this, that you were going to become a coach, as another way to serve?
No. No I didn't really. I wanted to help, and I've always wanted to help people; but as a coach? No I wasn't too sure. Because I was still trying to find myself. I didn't know.
Meeting these wonder like-minded people during the Foundations, people were really interested and empathetic, these are the fellow students, and to hear my story and that warmth and that understanding that I felt from the staff here at The Coaching Institute as well as the students-
Yeah, the community. It was beautiful. I felt at ease. I'm not the first person that's had similar things happen and I certainly won't be the last. There's certainly people out there who have got their story. That was my story and everyone has their own story, so yeah.
So you did your Foundations training and you realize that this is your journey, which is massive because it's really it's another level of commitment to you and being there for you.
An incredible commitment.
What does that mean to you?
I've learned to say yes to me. I've been a people pleaser my whole life. I've always served. My wife, my kids, my friends I've always lived by a bit of mantra. If my friends and family are happy I'm happy. I've learned that that's a bit of a mask.
I deserve more.
I think everybody deserves more.
I imagine that the relationship that you have with yourself, with other people, the decisions that you're making; how has that changed for the better?
I've learned not to worry about the things I can not control. You know that's the number one ... I wouldn't say I'm bulletproof, but I'm pretty close to bulletproof on that. That's not saying I won't get upset by things, but I'm not going to dwell on them. I'm not going to worry about them. Once it's happened, it's happened. I can't do anything about it.
Yeah. Where I was in my life, I was very not Mr. Negativity but in regards to myself I thought oh yeah I was 100 percent if everyone else is alright, I'm alright, but I wasn't.
So now its time for you to build this journey with yourself.
Exactly and through that I've managed to, I believe, become a better person to myself and I have. I've become a better husband, definitely a better father, more positive ... a lot of my friends have said "I don't see anything on social media negative from you anymore."
People, they're amazed. The turn around, I think they've seen the turn around more than I have.
The way I see it I can then give that to a client because I'm leaving what I'm giving. What I'm selling or what I'm giving, what I'm preaching, whatever cliché you wanted to use yeah.
What's this journey been to you so far?
Well throughout I didn't know what I was going to learn.
That's why I did it was to learn, but what it meant to me when I first started was to think well look I'm saying yes to exploring myself. I'm saying yes to ... I'm taking that first step I'm not just jumping straight in and not knowing anything about it.
For me it was a way of finding out a little bit more information, information gathering if you want to use that, but what it means to me is now that I have made the commitment, to me, it means that I'm not afraid to say yes to me.
That's not to say I'm going to forget about all the other important people in my life.
They will still come first in many senses, but I need to be happy. I need to be fulfilled. I need to look after my mental health, my inner self.
That's not to say I'm not selfish or I don't have a selfish bone in my body, but I think that word selfish has got a lot of connotations to it.
"I've become a better husband, definitely a better father, more positive ... a lot of my friends have said "I don't see anything on social media negative from you anymore." People, they're amazed. The turn around, I think they've seen the turn around more than I have. . .”
What's this decision really meant to you?
It's given me a lot more self confidence. Well no I wouldn't say self confidence, some people might say I've never lacked that, but it's self belief, self trust.
I want to be able to give that, be able to teach people how to figure things out for themselves because that's what I've had to do. Yeah, so I just want to help people or teach people how to use the tools.
ABOUT ROSS
Ross started as someone who was constantly serving others and living unresourcefully. Through the Foundations of Coaching Success Training he has realised he does not need to be afraid to yes to himself.
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