So one of the beautiful practices we can bring into our life to deepen our own relationships with our self acceptance and self love is forgiveness.
LET IT GO!
Forgiveness is another thing I used to get wrong.
I used to think it was something we would only use when somebody had done something wrong by us.
But forgiveness is the opposite of acceptance. If I don’t forgive someone, what I’m doing it withholding love not just from them but from me too,
And that means I’m the one who loses out. I’m not open to receiving my own love.
This is a frame you can use to fall in love with yourself: Think of a person in your life and ask, ‘Is my heart open or closed to this person?’
When I first learned this I became very aware of the weight of resentment and grudges I was carrying around, thinking ‘This person didn’t listen to me’ or ‘My last workplace sucked’ or ‘My dad wasn’t there.’
I was holding onto how everyone had let me down.
It was heavy. And walking around with these massive burdens of withholding love from people meant I wasn’t giving myself love.
Here’s how I let it back in: I simply started the process of forgiveness. I said, ‘I forgive this person. I forgive this person. I forgive this person.’
And I let it go.
I practice this daily. I pay attention to what it feels like when my heart is open: warm, connected to other people, not overly worried about things.
When we have an open heart we see the greatness and potential in other people. And that means we see it in ourselves as well.
Starting to love yourself might start out as a challenge. It will turn into a gift. (One I'll be unwrapping more at 'How To Become A Relationship Coach.' I'd love to see you there on August 1.)