It’s called cognitive framing and it’s a fancy way of saying it’s the meaning you place on your experience that defines the experience you have with it.
If you say it’s bad, it’s bad.
If you say it’s good, it’s good.
Nothing comes with inherent meaning.
So we learn to frame a challenging experience and say, ‘This is good for me. Even though it’s challenging, it means I’ll have a better relationship with that challenge.’
Think about when you’ve done a workout before, something that’s new for you. You wanted to tighten up a certain area, let’s say your legs. So you put in the work then a day later you have really sore legs.
You wanted that soreness because it’s good for you (it’s called DOMS—delayed onset muscle soreness … yep, that comes from my previous life as a personal trainer!)
So you frame that soreness as a positive and say, ‘well, I’m sore but I’m glad, it means it was a good workout.’ If your legs were just randomly sore you’d freak out and go to the doctor, but because you know that soreness is moving you forward you frame it the right way.
You say this is good soreness. You see it will end well and make you stronger. Bring it.